Por Greg Bissky

Uma companhia é justa uma equipe grande, (equipe definida como “dois ou mais povos que trabalham junto em uma maneira comum para um objetivo comum”). Críticas para o sucesso são as discussões raciocinadas para soluções mútuo-aceitáveis e as trocas frank das opiniões e dos disagreements. Todos os tipos de equipes, esportes, negócio ou união, são somente tão fortes quanto a abilidade de membros da equipe de cooperar junto e trabalhar. Falha das equipes sem uma comunicação boa.

Os povos com experiência nas culturas estrangeiras, através do curso ou do trabalho, sabem que as culturas diferentes fazem coisas em maneiras diferentes. Os exemplos comuns estão dando presentes, que se senta onde no jantar, e as culturas da maneira usam a língua comunicar-se.

Do “a língua uso” não significa a gramática, a pronunciação ou o vocabulário. Estas são habilidades de língua justas. Naturalmente um determinado nível da língua habilidade-em-comum é necessário para uma comunicação cruz-cultural, mas as habilidades de língua são justas um começo, não uma extremidade.

Talvez a mais melhor maneira explicar é usar uma situação que a maioria de povos são familiares com: uma comunicação da marido-esposa. Em meu caso though, não é justo uma macho-fêmea mas também Chinês-Ocidental. Algum fundo: meus esposa e eu (do chinês) fomos casados cinco anos (agora 14), temos os graus mestres, habilidades boas da segundo-língua e a experiência distante-mais-do que-média tratando dos povos das culturas diferentes. Ou seja nós devemos ter poucos problemas que comunicamo-nos um com o otro. Como eu desejo que era verdadeiro. Não é: nós discutimos mais sobre uma comunicação do que todas as cinco outras coisas.

Como podia isso ser? We understand (and love) each other, understand each other’s culture and speak each other’s language. Women first: her common complaints are, “You use Chinese like a Westerner: you are too direct, especially when you ask questions and analyze situations; you use too much logic and not enough feelings; you embarrass people by discussing the good and bad points of their proposal in front of others; you are just too rude and not polite enough.” To put that in perspective, my family and long-time Canadian friends continually remark on how much more patient, reserved and less aggressive I’ve become since living in Asia. Most would not call me rude (I hope). In my opinion what my wife calls rude is in fact efficiency, getting straight to the point and focusing on result, not process.

My turn. My wife’s English is better than my Chinese but I still go crazy asking her direct, yes/no questions (like “Do you think I should do this?”). While she does answer me, only very rarely does she use the words yes or no. Instead she tells me a story (of sorts), and from what she says, how she says it, body language etc. I must guess her answer. Explained in detail in the class, one reason why is because there is no one word for yes and no in Chinese. Of course Chinese can communicate no and yes; how though depends on context. Context is crucial.

Classified a high context language, Chinese (all dialects) is designed to maintain stability and harmony at all costs, not to question or be clear. A common way this is done is by communicating negatives without actually saying “no.” It works for Chinese, but, as it is based on the ability to guess meaning, it is tough for Westerners to master. Most Westerners don’t practice making people guess … and have little problem saying a clear “no” when necessary.

Rules Of Communication

Each culture expects language to be used in a specific way. We all grow up learning the right way to use language. Often called “leaning how to be polite,” it goes far deeper than just politeness. We learn rules—rules that determine our belief in the right and wrong way to use language. Called the Rules of Communication, they determine how we feel language should be used. Language is but a tool used in culturally-specific and unique ways.

Learned from childhood, the Rules guide our attitude towards communication and our belief in what’s correct and what’s not. These hidden beliefs determines how a person communicates, and how he or she expects communication to be offered. We all learn to expect messages to be given in certain ways. Expectations are crucial in cross-cultural communication. Not only do they govern our unthinking reactions and beliefs of what is/is not polite, they determine what things mean.

Westerners expect disagreement to be clearly stated. If they receive a negative-sounding message that doesn’t include a clear statement of disagreement, Westerners tend to think it expresses some form of misgiving or concern; something milder than “disagreement.” This leads to perhaps the most common problem Westerners have in a Chinese office—as Chinese believe disagreement should be indirect and polite, Westerners often don’t realize when someone is disagreeing.

Note the problem here: the Westerner is not “confused,” he “misunderstands” … as does the Chinese. Both are certain the other understands though. The result? At some time in the future, say when the Westerner discovers the Chinese doing something different than he agreed to do, the Westerner will not-be-happy (at minimum). He will probably tell his Chinese partner that he’s not doing what he agreed to do. Even if the Westerner is patient and polite (which, considering he feels he is right and the Chinese said one thing then did another, is not really likely), how do you think the Chinese will react? Remember, as far as the Chinese is concerned, he’s right and the Westerner is wrong. While Chinese manners may mean he’d not argue openly, inside he’d be thinking bad thoughts. Both of them would actually, something like, “Can I trust this person?”

Communication success is never easy, even when communicating with someone of your native culture. We may try to be clear, but many things can go wrong. Communication is rarely perfect, even with best friends or family members. Different cultural expectations makes cross-cultural communication far harder. To be successful a sender must be aware of the expectations of the audience. What works with a member of your native culture won’t necessarily work with a member of the host culture.

Overcoming cultural expectations is difficult, but possible. First is needed an awareness of the foundations of the other person’s culture, i.e., not just what the expectations are but why they are. To communicate with people from another culture you must think about communication the way they do and understand why it is important and proper for them to think that way. Once why is understood, the what (the principles or Rules of Communication) and the how (language skills) naturally follow (or become easier to learn and accept).

Greg Bissky, www.treasuremountain.com

This article is the second part of the article “Communication in Chinese Offices”. Next week we will publish part three.